Culture

Wow! This couple was able to retire before 40 by tragically dying in bus crash

October 22, 2019 theblendweekly

Burlington, VT – Sarah and Jason Reed inspired millennials across the country this week by successfully saving for a very early retirement. Their trick? –

Old Faithful Caught Mingling with Younger, Hotter Geyser

October 3, 2019 theblendweekly

Now the Earth’s crust shifts and all of the sudden this new Geyser is here, right next to Old Faithful? I barely even know this geyser! And everybody is asking me about it and telling me how it looks really hot.

Eco-Conscious Bride Only Wants Paper Dick-Shaped Straws at Bachelorette Party

September 24, 2019 theblendweekly

Key West, Florida As the bride-to-be, Jenna Warren, and her gang of six besties prepare to descend upon Key West this upcoming weekend for a

Report: Husband Just Going to Rearrange Dishwasher Anyway

September 19, 2019 theblendweekly

Baltimore, MD Local woman, Andrea Hill, has reportedly given up on attempting to find the correct placement for soiled dishes in her family’s 24″ stainless

Loser Dad With No Estranged Children Had Zero Chance to Relax on Father’s Day

June 20, 2019 theblendweekly

Last Sunday, families came together to celebrate dads across the nation. Fathers and their families enjoyed backyard barbecues, large family get-togethers, baseball games, and picnics

Woman Asks Smug Airline Employee If She Can Consolidate Her Three Carry On Bags By Shoving One of Them Up Her Ass

May 23, 2019 theblendweekly

Chicago, IL After a real shitfuck day ending with a painful traffic-riddled commute to Chicago’s O’hare International Airport, local woman, Vanessa Bauer, was smugly asked

Alabama Women Rejoice Gaining HOV Lane Rights with Six-Week Zygotes

May 15, 2019 theblendweekly

Alabama Women won big yesterday in Alabama. After hundreds of years of oppression, sexism and lack of autonomy, things are finally turning around for uterus